Tuesday Technology Rant

Technology is my life. I love the stuff. I love being engaged in conversations with my fellow tech heads about RAM, Motherboards, HDMI, URL, TCP/IP, Warp Speed, and new ways to brew coffee. What I love most about technology is that most of it is the result of forward thinking. When stuff becomes obsolete right after I buy it (like my Blackberry), I give a hearty "HOO-AH" to the Technology world. It is always moving forward, with one notable exception.

There is one particular facet of Technology that refuses to get better with age. In fact, it only gets worse. I am referring to Voicemail Greetings.

Remember when the answering machine first came out? Well, I do, and no, I am not old, despite the fact that my children laugh at me when I say, "When I was a kid..." Hey, I can't help the fact that we only had one rotary dial phone in the kitchen which we would fight to answer. I didn't even own a cell phone before age 25, and most of my brood got cell phones before their drivers licenses.

So where was I...? Ah yes, Voicemail Greetings.

The first thing you hear when you call most people is their personal greeting.

"Hello, this is the voicemail of Todd Vick, please leave me a message after the beep and I will call you back."

Simple, direct and to the point. Works for me. But, instead of a beep, you hear a 1960s operator give you the same spiel over again.

"After the tone, please record your message. When you have finished recording, hang up, or, press the # key for more options."

More options? Why would I need more options? I just wanted to leave a message, which I have now forgotten because of this verbose horn-rimmed glasses wearing operator. However, I WOULD like the option of not having to listen to you anymore. I...just...want...my...BEEP!

We have cell phones that can surf the net, check Facebook, and trade stocks real time, but I can't get a simple greeting and a beep. Maybe it's because of some old Union clause that we still have to listen to these nasal-talking fruitcakes.

Enclosing, I want to apologize in advance if I leave you a message with a certain aggravated inflection in my voice. Just know that it's not you, it's that I had to wait for the beep.


James said…
I am curious as to the identity of The Woman. She is on every automated voice mail message and recording in the world, and yet no one knows her name.

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